The cycle repeats.

Image by Ed Yourdon via Flickr

It’s happening all over again. What I always knew. Friends you think who will be there, forever, just leave.

It happened before and it’s gonna happen this time round.

I’m such a believer of people who is never gonna stay around forever.

No matter how much I try to reach out.

Maybe that’s why I’m such a social butterfly, I don’t hang around with just one group of people.

It hurts too much when they start distancing and separating.

I’m destined to be forever alone.

We constantly subject our heart to such feelings, we have lost count of the number of holes and cuts others have left in them.

I suppose I should just install myself with a frozen heart, never to warm up and be susceptible to all those hurt.

On a different note, it’s also the 10th anniversary of 9/11.

Been hooked on cable all day watching the news covering what has happened to the world ever since.

The war that lasted 10 years and have not ended.

What are we to say what’s gonna happen in the next 10.

Who is even gonna stay long enough to see what actually happens?

Maybe I might even be gone tomorrow.

Unpredictability of life, but yet the stories the same.

Ponder, ponder.

Related articles

• 9/11 10 years later.. (cobblestonesandheels.wordpress.com)
• Remembering 9/11 (horsesass.org)
• The power to be… (psychetymology.wordpress.com)

Some people are just so….

wired weirdly.
Was on the bus today, and sat in front of this loud mouthed aunty. She was blabbering on her phone at such a volume that every single person was practically in her conversation.
Me, being so bad assed tired and lethargic today decided to just move a few seats to the front but not before giving her the stink eye and a small sound of disapproval.
This lady started insulting me, hurling vulgarity at me like nobody’s business. Cursing me, my family, my ancestors. I was so mad when she started dissing my mum. I wanted to seriously go up to her and tell her that, “Yeah I have no dad, what you gonna do about it?” And moving along with me as I changed seats. I have no idea what’s she trying to do, is she trying to provoke me further by irritating me with her microphone voice? Is she gonna bitchslap me? But no, she just kept blabbering on about how young I am, how rude and disrespectful I was. Seriously, who is the unmannered one here, hurling vulgaruties and cursing my family. I doubt that is well mannered in any culture or any society. People were staring at her and the scene she was making and she felt no shame to stop but continued throwing insults.
Why would anybody do that? Are they constantly on the search for attention? Would it make them happy if I created a scene and started arguing with her on the bus? Does she want to make either one of us stomp famous? Even while on public transport, it is common courtesy to actually speak at a moderate volume and not be a mighty loudspeaker.

Who can I call my friends?

They come and go just like everything else. Never staying, never truly being there. How do you judge whether someone is worth investing the time and money into.
What if after years together, they still leave? The memories together will then be meaningless without their companion.
The laughter and jokes we once shared never the same again.
Everything in life is never gonna stay long, nothing ever stays long enough. People make such big promises of always being there for you.
But, yet in the end, they still leave as fast as they trampled into your life.
Life ain’t like the Sims, you force them to talk and they become instant friends. It ain’t easy to find someone whom you can click easily.
Maybe I should just curl into a ball of spikes, keeping everyone and everything at arm’s length, and never allowing myself into all these attachments, maybe I won’t feel as hurt by them. Hurting them before they start hurting me, maybe I won’t feel the pain then.
But without all these attachments, there ain’t really a need to actually survive in this horrible cruel place we call home.
How is this even home if people come and go as they please, they say oh, I miss you so, but yet, when a little crack appears and they suddenly become totally unrelated.

Are we just plain lazy to keep in contact or did we just become too busy to bother with each others lives?

Trust no one, I’d say.

Related articles

• RUHCUS Day 14:Second Chances (onlyconfidence.wordpress.com)
• Life hurts (minahawke.wordpress.com)

What is normal?

How would you define normal?

Social norms are the accepted behavior of a culture of a  society or group.

If being normal is something that we all yearn for and actually aim in life, wouldn’t that make us blatantly boring people?

Is our purpose in life truly to be ordinary folk and not extraordinary?

If being not normal in life is frowned upon, is looked down upon, is disgusted and thrown stones at for, then wouldn’t that make those ignorant people the Voldermots and Hitlers & us the mudbloods and jews of the society?

Or would we want to be something special?

Every single one of us is born and bred differently, we do not all follow the same set of rules growing up and do not have the same social standings in life.

Being normal means we will have to conform to the standards and force ourselves into a state of normalcy. How would that bring about the changes we see in the society right now?

We would not have Barack Obama, the first African American President of the United States, we would still be in a society where racial discrimination and gender discrimination would still be happening. We definitely will not see the changes we see in our lives everyday.

Asking questions and being ultimately curious about random stuff is who I am. Since young, I have been laughed at for all my ‘stupid’ questions, and no one has ever bothered to listen to me or my opinions because of such.

I try my best to be who I am and be who I want to be with no regards to the frowns of the society I live in. I dance to my iPod on the public transportation, I walk with swagger & style and express my discontent.  I live my life to the fullest and never be damned by ******* around.

Related articles

• “Normal” Personalities (opinionswerelikekittens.com)
• It’s All a Matter of Strengths and Weaknesses (acceptingdifferences.wordpress.com)
• Beating Normal (roguetraderette.wordpress.com)

What and what?

Does the good things we do in life cancel out the bad things we commit?
Is it alright for us to steal if we helped an old lady cross the street?
How is such stuff measured?
Or is it the realization of our dumb acts and it’s consequences mean that we have noted the severity of our actions and never to do it again?
We can fall off the wagon and some how commit another mistake again.
Or do we go through “judgement” at the end of our life and every single error and success is highlighted, measured and recorded to actually determine our standing in life.
Are we sinners or saint?
Or are we judged by ourselves and seen by ourselves whether we have done anything wrong?
The many ways different point of view and how we’re judged comes from a different understanding of the situation.

And on this day.

I seriously don’t believe that someone can have a goal in life to sit at a desk and just draw charts and graphs for a living.
Even if it pays some awfully decent amount of money.
We should be out living our life to the maximum an not waste it at a job.
And maybe that is why finding a aim in life is so difficult for me.
I don’t want to just look forward to the weekends.
I want to look forward to a daily enjoyment and excitement of what drives me.

And on this day.

I seriously don’t believe that someone can have a goal in life to sit at a desk and just draw charts and graphs for a living.
Even if it pays some awfully decent amount of money.
We should be out living our life to the maximum an not waste it at a job.
And maybe that is why finding a aim in life is so difficult for me.

Today,

An American woman came up to me to ask where she can find a pay-phone that accepts Credit Cards as she has no cash on hand anymore.

She said she has been asking around for help for a very long time.

I didn’t know of any, and so I let her use my mobile phone.

She had to call a friend in America to transfer her money and to unblock her Cards so that she can have money to use.

I feel so good inside that I’m helping somebody and hope that one day, if I ever get lost overseas or if I’m in need of any help, someone would be so nice and go the extra mile to help me too.

I’m thankful that there are such people around to help.

Even though some people commented that she could be a scam and that I was dumb to let her use my phone for so long.

I really like helping people and seeing that they are so relieved when you can help relieve their burden.

When was the last time you told somebody life is gonna be better. Or just to carry that bag of groceries she’s struggling with?

Something or anything can brighten a person’s day.

How’d you feel about believing?

Watching last week’s episode of Glee, it was all about God, or believing in something.

Is there something I believe in?

I’m not sure.

Not to sound egotistical or anything, but I believe in striving hard for myself.

It’s not about praying or anything that works.

It’s about how hard you push yourself to be better.

I don’t if that will cause me to end up all alone in life.

But who can you trust?

You put all your trust in God, and what if things just don’t go the way you ask him for.

It’s all about striving hard for yourself.

Related Articles

• Are You There, God? Glee’s Twist on Faith (omg.yahoo.com)

Totally love to visit

freshly pressed on wordpress everyday.

Was reading one that really shook my world.

Seriously, why can’t we just have wholesome good looking girls on screen?

Do they really have to be so thin and slim just so that they will not appear fat.

I was influenced when i was younger to be so bamboo-like that i starved myself and forced myself to only drink juice all day long.

It caused me to have gastric problems.

I am now happily eating healthily and am at a very healthy weight.

Related Articles

• Eating a Healthy Diet (justslimming.com)
• The slim fast diet, effective or not? (justslimming.com)
• Post-Dieting: What’s Involved? (mariaslastdiet.com)

How so

Do we fix the problem of Asians being reserved about their feelings?
They don’t say I love you enough.
They don’t shower people with hugs and kisses.
They run away at the slightest sign of fear.
They stay safe and don’t take challenges.
But yet they expect people to understand how they are feeling.
People in this country is so unacceptable of public display of affections.
The small hug, or the little peck on cheeks are met with the worst criticism. You’ll most probably find pictures on the Internet and people throwing abuses.
It would mean a total disgrace to the family name if you’re seen being close to friends.
Pride is so important, and the thinking of us is too traditional and downright absurd.
I would love to be showered with hugs and kisses, that would make me know that people love me, people care abou me.
I like the feeling of being hugged. The warmth of it is so comfortable.

Do not be afraid

Image via Wikipedia

of making mistakes.

It’s when you learn a lesson and grow to be stronger and wise-r.

I admit I have done some stupid stuff, stuff thatI regret deeply.

But I know I won’t be who I am without these stupid stuff.

I am ashamed of these mistakes.

And they haunt me sometimes.

I grow up knowing I should never do them.

And I make decisions with these mistakes in mind.

I beat myself up sometimes for being so silly.

I’m doing my best to stand up and walk again.

I wish I can run like I do, like when my life seems a whirl.

Everything just seem to move so fast and I enjoyed it so much.

But life’s a dull now, work seems to just draw so much energy from my spirit.

Bless me with the luck to stand up and be tall.

Related Articles

• Why Are We Afraid of Having Regrets? (psychologytoday.com)
• When You Are Afraid What’s the Worst Thing That Could Happen? (beliefnet.com)

Any country

that you visit, you will definitely see people begging.

No matter how old they are, young kids, old people or even adults. They use different methods to wrench your hearts. Sitting in wheelchairs,  being blind, having no legs or just perfectly healthy. You would not know if they are faking it or really that weak.

I wonder why can’t they just get a normal job. I believe there is a job for them if they are willing to look for one. It’s not like Singapore has got no opportunities for anyone. You can see people who’s deaf working at KFC, or communities and groups that help these people who are not as able-bodied as us to survive in this society.

Even on the streets, if they are not begging, they are standing in corners of the street pushing themselves onto people to buy tissue paper from them at 3 for $1. Which is unreasonably priced, but Singaporeans call them Karma Tissue. But, in a busy street like Bugis, you can find around 10 such people doing that. It’s totally crazy!

Some people are so crazy from begging they come up to you while you’re eating, get down on their knees and really beg you to ‘donate’.

Such people really get on my nerve, they can easily find a job if they want to, but they are just not willing to or they have just given up hope and decide not to believe in themselves anymore.

Comment with what makes you so pissed, or a story of what you’ve experienced before.

Have you

Found your passion in life?
Something that makes you who you are today.
Was there anybody who inspired your passionate endeavors?
Anyone who guided you to the light?
I’m still searching for that light.
Something that makes me go so excited to wake up every single day to hop on it and be the best I can be at it.
I feel my days now are filled with mundane stuff, I work at a lousy job, with horrible lazy people, mundane work and even worse pay. That doesn’t drive me. That is slowly sucking away my soul.
What are the steps needed to take before I can fulfill that drive of mine?
How can I start working on it?
Older generations have such a dead mentality and don’t always take what you mean and say to any sense. Thinking it’s all just a frivolous 3 minute sensation of yours.
What’s your take on this?
I would love to heat your passion and what you have went through to get where you are today.

If you ever

Take a walk around the older neighborhoods around Singapore.
You’ll see alot of old folks manning their stalls and provision shops.
Such are a rare sight to see.
Selling everything from dried noodles to incense paper & preserved vegetables.
These people have been there since their teens and because they grew up poor, they do not have the money for a proper education, and can only do what their parents did for a living.
Some of them even gave up their right to study so that their younger siblings will have a chance at a better education.
Now, because of the fast paced moving of the nation, there are supermarkets everywhere, even 5 mins away from home.
I have 3 within walking distance.
And people are forgetting these old shops.
Supermarkets have better deals, fresher foods and cheaper merchandise. It’s also a one stop convenient shop.
Who will ever visit these shops, with their dim lighting, limited stocks, not as cheap purchases and inconvenient location?
What do you love about these shops? Do leave a comment and share with me.